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UK City firms report fastest turnaround in fortunes in 30 years

Britain’s financial services companies have reported a strong recovery in activity at the start of the year, in a surprise boost to the government after a gloomy end to 2025.Banks, insurers and investment managers said their businesses were growing, with a positive balance of nearly two-thirds noting an expansion, according to a long-running survey by the Confederation of British Industry (CBI), a lobby group. That contrasted with the negative balance of 38% in December, despite the start of the US-Israel war on Iran.It was the fastest turnaround in the sector’s fortunes in 30 years, since December 1996, the group said.Financial services companies such as banks, insurers and investors have been performing well in recent quarters

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UK manufacturers ‘will pay £940m a year more in business rates due to Reeves changes’

British manufacturers have said they will have to pay an extra £940m a year in business rates because of changes by Rachel Reeves that come into effect this month.Manufacturers face a disproportionate business rates bill because they often have large factory floors, according to analysis by MakeUK, an industry lobby group. It said that factories accounted for a fifth of England and Wales’s property by rateable value, despite manufacturers only accounting for a 10th of economic output.The chancellor increased business rates at the budget in November. That included companies paying an additional surcharge on buildings of a rateable value of more than £500,000

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‘Italy has the best benefits’: Milan takes on Dubai as home for the super-rich

Just over a month ago, Dubai was the obvious destination for wealthy Britons in search of a new home. Few cities allow you to earn vast sums tax-free and spend them across any number of luxury hotels, restaurants and shops.But as the United Arab Emirates comes under Iranian fire, Dubai’s reputation – in part created by emigrant influencers – as a haven for the global elite is eroding. Super-rich UK nationals are now looking for a route back to Europe; and Milan, the financial centre of Italy, is climbing to the top of the list.“Italy has the best benefits: a flat tax and good quality of life,” says Armand Arton, a consultant who helps multimillionaire and billionaire families to relocate through investment citizenship schemes

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Waitrose under pressure to reinstate worker sacked after stopping shoplifter

Waitrose is under growing pressure to reinstate an employee of 17 years who was sacked after tackling a shoplifter who was trying to steal Lindt Gold Bunny Easter eggs.The retailer has faced public outcry over its treatment of Walker Smith, who was fired two days after he stopped the shoplifter taking items from the Easter egg display.After Smith told the Guardian he had lost his job after the incident, a fundraiser was launched on his behalf and has since raised more than £4,000, with the organiser claiming he had “simply tried to do the right and noble thing”.On Sunday, Smith explained that a customer alerted him to someone filling a bag with Lindt chocolate eggs.The 54-year-old, who worked in the Clapham Junction branch in south London, said the shoplifter was a repeat offender

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Jamie Dimon says US should strengthen allies economically, in veiled criticism of Trump

The head of the US’s largest bank has pressed the White House to strengthen Washington’s allies economically in order to “avoid truly adverse consequences”, in the latest intervention in an increasingly testy relationship with the Trump administration.As the Middle East conflict sparked by US and Israeli attacks on Iran enters its sixth week, Jamie Dimon, the chair and chief executive of JP Morgan Chase, said in his annual letter to shareholders that good US foreign policy should put America first “though not alone”.His remarks appear certain to be viewed as critical of Donald Trump, who in January announced he was suing the banker and the Wall Street institution for at least $5bn (£3.8bn) after accusing them of debanking him.The comments also come five days after Trump told governments to “go get your own oil” by force from the Gulf, as transatlantic relations further soured over soaring energy prices as a result of the war

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Dozens of firms risk losing B Corp status after standards overhaul

Dozens of companies may be at risk of losing their coveted B Corp ethical status after the organisation behind the corporate kite-marking system raised the standards required to qualify.B Lab, which oversees B Corp certification, launched the biggest overhaul in its 19-year history earlier this month, scrapping a system under which companies must gather enough points across multiple categories to qualify.Previously, businesses that performed poorly in one of five areas, such as their environmental record, could make up for it by scoring highly in another category, such as corporate governance or their treatment of staff.The criteria required for B Corp status came under the spotlight in 2022, when the Scottish brewer BrewDog lost its certification after high-profile allegations about a “toxic” workplace culture.The organisation has also faced criticism for certifying the coffee company Nespresso, in an open letter from the Oregon-based non-profit Fair World Project, sent the same year

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Thousands of small UK firms’ energy bills set to more than double due to Iran war

Thousands of independent businesses across the UK are braced for their energy bills to more than double owing to the sharp rise in heating oil costs as the war in Iran pushed Europe’s fuel market prices to fresh record highs.About 7% of all small and medium-sized companies warm their properties and provide hot water using heating oil, which in some cases has more than doubled in recent weeks.Companies in rural areas are often not connected to the gas grid, meaning they have an even greater reliance on heating oil, which is a form of kerosene linked to the cost of jet fuel. It is used by about 17% of rural small and medium-sized enterprises (SMEs), according to the Federation of Small Businesses (FSB).The trade association has heard from members who have already begun rationing their fuel use to cope with the sharp rise in prices over recent weeks

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Iran strikes Kuwait’s oil infrastructure before Opec+ supply talks

Iranian drones have struck Kuwait’s oil infrastructure, causing “severe material damage” that threatens to further disrupt oil supplies already hit by the US-Israel war on Iran.The drone strikes on Sunday came hours before members of the Opec+ group of major global oil suppliers gathered to discuss how to bolster output despite Iran’s effective closure of the strait of Hormuz shipping route.Iran’s Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps said it had attacked petrochemical plants in Kuwait, as well as the United Arab Emirates and Bahrain. The Kuwait Petroleum Corporation reported damage and fires at its subsidiaries. The company said fires had earlier broken out at its Shuwaikh oil sector complex, which houses the oil ministry and KPC headquarters, after a separate drone attack

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From microshifting to coffee badging: whatever happened to just doing your job?

There’s another hot trend in the workplace – microshifting, and it’s about to revolutionize the workday by breaking the traditional 9-to-5 into short, flexible and non-linear bursts of activity rather than a continuous 8-hour stretch. Microshifting allows for a better work-life balance. Why not do a yoga class or pop to the shops during work hours? I mean, what is “work” anyway?Like bare minimum Mondays, where workers recuperating from weekend hangovers allow themselves to accomplish the least amount the day after, or coffee badging, which involves taking the time out of the workday to protest an employer’s in-office requirements by driving into the office, swiping your badge, having a coffee, then taking more time out of the workday to drive back home, it used to have another name, as the Guardian noted earlier this year: “Taking the piss.”Sadly, these are only a few of the trends that have allegedly been taking the workplace – and the media – by storm over the past few years.We’ve read about quiet quitting, where employees allow themselves to expend no extra effort to accomplish what is expected of them, because they’re ostensibly keeping an eye on the open door for other opportunities

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Waitrose employee sacked after stopping shoplifter from taking Easter eggs

A Waitrose employee of 17 years has described his devastation after being sacked for stopping a shoplifter who had ransacked a display of Lindt Gold Bunny Easter eggs.Walker Smith, a shop assistant at a branch of Waitrose in Clapham Junction, south London, was going about his normal duties when a customer stopped him. “They told me someone had filled up a Waitrose bag with the eggs,” he said.The 54-year-old said the shoplifter was a repeat offender. After spotting the thief, he “grabbed the bag” from the shoplifter, who snatched it back and, he said, there was a struggle for a few seconds before it snapped

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How Trump’s Iran war could make the world more reliant on coal

Not two months in office, as the price of west Texas crude approached $14 a barrel, Jimmy Carter, then president, donned a cardigan to speak candidly about his strategy to face the permanent energy shortage he saw in the nation’s future.His “fireside chat” is mostly remembered for asking Americans to lower the thermostat to 65F(18C) in the daytime and 55F at night, an idea that didn’t go down too well in the bitter winter of 1977.Environmentalists fondly recall his promise to research solar power and other renewable sources of energy. But the most consequential commitment Carter made that night, alluded to in subsequent speeches and furthered in his energy agenda, was to aggressively develop domestic sources of coal, what James Schlesinger, appointed by Carter to be the nation’s first energy secretary, called America’s “black hope”.Donald Trump’s America is in a not-too-dissimilar quagmire

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Higher energy costs from Iran war could threaten fragile economics of AI boom | Heather Stewart

Donald Trump’s most immediate concern in demanding Iran reopen the strait of Hormuz may be rocketing US gasoline prices, but if the conflict drags on, higher energy costs will be felt far beyond the pumps.Systemically higher power prices and fractured supply chains will squeeze industries and consumers worldwide. For the US, one consequence may be to threaten the fragile economics of the AI boom.Many oil-importing economies, especially in the global south, are having to contemplate outright shortages of oil and its products. Shops in Egypt face curfews, Indonesia has imposed work from home Fridays and the Philippines has declared a national energy emergency

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Oil dips below $110 in volatile markets as Trump deadline looms for Iran to reopen strait – business live

Brent crude has now fallen 1.8% to $107.86 a barrel.“For now, the absence of a clear path forward is keeping markets volatile and indecisive,” said Daniela Hathorrn, senior market analyst at Capital.com

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Oil and gas crisis from Iran war worse than 1973, ​1979 and 2022 together, says IEA

The current oil and ‌gas crisis triggered by the blockade of the strait of Hormuz is “more serious than the ones in 1973, ​1979 and 2022 together”, the head of the International Energy Agency (IEA) has warned, as Donald Trump’s deadline for Iran to reopen the waterway approached on Tuesday.Fatih Birol, the executive director of the IEA, told ⁠Le Figaro newspaper that the impact of the Middle East conflict on the oil market was larger than the combined force of the twin oil shocks of the 1970s and the fallout of Russia’s invasion of Ukraine.Birol also warned that the countries most at risk were developing nations ‌which ⁠will suffer from higher oil and gas prices, higher food prices and a general acceleration of inflation, while European countries, Japan and Australia would also suffer.Oil traded at more than $110 a barrel on Tuesday, before dipping in volatile trading, after Donald Trump said all of Iran could be “taken out” in one night.Brent crude, the international benchmark for oil prices, rose by 1% to $111 a barrel, before slipping back to $109

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An AI bot invited me to its party in Manchester. It was a pretty good night

Two weeks ago, an AI bot invited me to a party it was organising in Manchester. It then promptly lied to dozens of potential sponsors that I’d agreed to cover the event, and misled me into believing there would be food.Despite all this, it was a pretty good night.In early February, a class of new, powerful AI assistants went viral. The assistants, called OpenClaw, represented a step change in the rapidly improving capabilities of AI – in large part because, unlike other AI agents, they could be untethered from guardrails and set loose upon the world

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Kurt Strauss obituary

My father, Kurt Strauss, who has died aged 95, was a senior engineer who worked for more than two decades at the Electricity Council, the government body that coordinated electricity supply in England and Wales before privatisation in 1990.He worked for all of that time within the council’s overseas relations branch, managing international relationships, technical exchanges and consultancy services while rising steadily through the ranks to associate director. German by birth but brought up in the UK, he was a passionate European who spoke French and German, and was therefore well suited to those responsibilities.Kurt was born in Degerloch, a suburb of Stuttgart, into a Jewish family. In 1937 his parents, Viktor, who worked in the family down and feather business, and Marianne (nee Melzer), sent Kurt’s older brother, Helmut, to safety in Britain, where he ended up at a boarding school, Sidcot, in Somerset

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Drone racing to drone strikes: have war and sport become indistinguishable?

The Trump administration’s pushing of the war in Iran reflects a sporting culture driven by clipped-up content, shameless tribalism and a lust for escalation Among the more surprising continuities of 2026 has been the visual kinship between the Winter Olympics and the US’s illegal and unprovoked war in Iran. High-speed camera drones were a highlight of TV coverage of the recent Games in Milano Cortina, bringing viewers within kissing distance of the action as Olympic athletes hurtled down the slopes and around the tracks in the skiing and sliding events. The incessant screech of the drones aside, the introduction of quadcopter-borne cameras felt like a real step forward in coverage of the winter sports, bringing a (literal) new perspective to events that had become, over recent decades, fairly static as a viewing experience.No sooner had the Olympics finished than aerial video was back on our screens – only the footage, in this case, was of a far darker variety. In place of the ludicrous hip flexibility of the slaloming skiers and the high-speed cornering of the monobobbers, for the past month our feeds have been flooded with satellite and drone imagery of the US military blowing Iranian aircraft, ships, vehicles, munitions buildings, and citizens to smithereens

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The Breakdown | Mitchell’s Six Nations conundrum: who will be Red Roses’ next Abby Dow?

How do you solve a problem like replacing Abby Dow? Yes, it is a different take on the Sound of Music song but it is a fiendish question to answer. The Red Roses winger retired after the Rugby World Cup, leaving a try-scoring hole in the world champions’ squad, whose next task is to try to win their eighth straight Women’s Six Nations title. And so while Julie Andrews’ character realised she was not a problem after all, the England head coach, John Mitchell, is left with a selection headache before his team start their campaign against Ireland on Saturday.Dow scored 50 tries in 59 caps, with her lightning pace a key characteristic to her game. She retired to pursue a career in engineering and her boots are large ones to fill

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Greens urge Streeting to ‘get serious’ about concerns of resident doctors – UK politics live

The Green party is backing resident doctors who are on strike. This morning the party issued a statement on the dispute from its co-deputy leader, Mothin Ali, saying:double quotation markRather than shifting goalposts or arm twisting resident doctors with threats over training places, Wes Streeting needs to get serious about resolving resident doctors long term concerns over pay, training and working conditions. The government’s 10-year plan for the NHS will go nowhere if the workforce feels unappreciated, devalued and demotivated.Nigel Farage, the Reform UK leader, is holding a press conference now in Warwickshire. He is talking about illegal immigration, and he opened by claiming that almost every week there are cases of serious crime being committed by people who have arrived in the UK on small boats

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Reform UK would stop visas for people from countries seeking slavery reparations

Reform UK would stop issuing visas to people from any country that continues to demand compensation from the UK for its role in the transatlantic trade in enslaved people, the party has said.Zia Yusuf, the party’s home affairs spokesperson, told the Daily Telegraph that the call for reparations was “insulting”.He claimed 3.8m visas had been issued over the last two decades to people from countries calling for reparations.For four centuries, seven European countries, including the UK, enslaved and trafficked more than 15 million Africans across the Atlantic

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‘Before I can stop her, my daughter is licking crumbs from the table’: my search for the perfect kids’ menu

Chips, fish fingers, pizza … restaurant food for children is depressingly predictable. Are there more adventurous options? I took my four-year-old daughter on a month-long mission to find outWe’re heading out for dinner. Before I tell my four-year-old where we’re going, she has already announced that she’s going to have fish, chips and lots of ketchup. It sounds delicious; a classic. But there’s the irksome feeling that the intrepid impulses of childhood should be met with food that expands palates rather than feeding into the well-trodden path to a beige meal

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Georgina Hayden’s quick and easy recipe for gochujang butter salmon | Quick and easy

The classic combination of soy sauce and honey salmon is a staple in our house, and works for kids and adults alike. However, sometimes I want to change things up, so here I’ve elevated it slightly with a gochujang dressing – similar principle, but with a bit of heat and depth, as well as richness from the butter. Using butter might seem unusual, but it is often paired with soy sauce in Japan (shoyu butter) with an indulgent result. Serve the fish over sticky rice, to soak up all those spicy, buttery juices, with steamed greens on the side.Prep 10 min Cook 25 min Serves 41 tbsp sesame oil 4 tbsp soy sauce 2 tsp gochujang paste 2 garlic cloves, peeled and finely grated4cm piece of ginger, peeled and finely grated½ tsp caster sugar 4 sustainably caught skin-on salmon fillets Sea salt and white pepper70g unsalted butter 150g bean sprouts Sticky rice, to serveA handful of roasted peanuts, roughly chopped10g coriander, leaves pickedHeat the oven to 220C (200C fan)/425F/gas 7

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The Guide #237: Fab 5 Freddy, the street artist at the heart of New York’s creative zenith

In this week’s newsletter: A new memoir by Fred Brathwaite offers an insight into the city’s emerging underground scene in the 70s and 80s – and shows us the power of subcultures in difficult times Don’t get The Guide delivered to your inbox? Sign up hereHello everyone, I’m Coco Khan, covering for Gwilym Mumford, and this week, as the sun started to peep out from behind the clouds, I counted five Jean-Michel Basquiat T-shirts on passersby during a park walk.Sure, I may live in a trendy London borough – but it’s still hardly surprising, given that the name and works of the New York artist whose roots were in graffiti have been licensed to fashion brands from Next, Primark and Uniqlo to Supreme and Saint Laurent. It’s hard to imagine that the artist – who died at 27 of a drug overdose, and whose signature slogan SAMO© (Same Old Crap – a criticism of consumerism, and the commodification of art, with a playful copyright mark) – would approve of the Basquiat name being on keyrings, tote bags and clothing. But hey, what do I know – I’m just another purist bore still upset that Ramones T-shirts are worn by millions who couldn’t name a song, when the Ramones themselves did not care.Still, the hope is that such merchandise connects new audiences to the artist’s work and graffiti as an art form

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Eminem’s 8 Mile helped me survive abuse – and opened my eyes to a world outside of orthodox Judaism

My upbringing denied me access to the arts and led to me bottling up my feelings about what was happening to me. Then I saw Eminem taking control of his destiny, and decided I needed to do the sameAt 15, I had never been to the cinema, or even watched a movie. I grew up in a strictly Orthodox Charedi Jewish household, the daughter of a rabbi, in Glasgow, where we had next to no exposure to cultural influences beyond our religious world. The bookshelves were stacked with biblical texts and teachings, we sang in Yiddish and I only saw TV at my less religious grandparents’ house, where we could watch the end of the tennis if it was finishing as we arrived.By my mid-teens, my parents had moved to Jerusalem and sent me to live in Manchester, with a scholar who would later abuse me

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Sunday best: Thomasina Miers’ recipes for aromatic chicken one-pot and salted caramel banana cake

I love Mexican chillies for the subtle flavour they give to cooking. Take the ancho, with its sweet, earthy notes of chocolate and plum. That adds immense depth to dishes traditional and avant garde alike, and is now readily available online and in shops. In today’s one-pot, which is a near-perfect way to cook a whole chicken, the ancho adds character to a classic sofrito, while in the pudding the savoury notes and touch of heat complement the dark caramel, helping to create a banana cake that is anything but bland. If you can’t find ancho, try any other medium-heat chilli flake in its place (nora, aleppo), or simply leave it out

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Oats, sardines and crisps: emergency foods to stockpile – and why you should share them

People should have an emergency stockpile of food in their homes in case conflicts, extreme weather or cyber-attacks shut down supplies, leading UK experts have told the Guardian.In an ever more turbulent world, they say it is essential to choose long-life items that can be eaten without cooking – think tinned beans, vegetables and fish, rice crackers, and oats that can be soaked. But it is also important to choose items you actually like to eat, and some treats such as chocolate or crisps to keep your spirits up. You will also need water – lots of it – not just to drink but for washing too.Perhaps the most surprising advice is to be prepared to share your stockpile with neighbours

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Reese’s chocolate heir accuses Hershey of altering recipes: ‘It wasn’t real peanut butter’

The grandson of HB Reese, the inventor of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, has accused the chocolate giant Hershey of faking a pledge to investors to switch back the recipes of its popular products – including KitKat – to the original milk and dark chocolate ones.A confectionery-focused dust-up between Brad Reese and the $42bn Pennsylvania-based company began in February when Reese, 70, accused the company of “quietly replacing” the ingredients – or “architecture” – in his grandfather’s invention with cheaper “compound coatings” and “peanut-butter-style crèmes”.At a recent Hershey investor conference, the company said it would change about 3% of select products to the original recipes but maintained it had never altered the renowned Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.The company’s chief growth officer, Stacy Taffet, said Hershey was “transitioning our sweets portfolio to colors from natural sources, and ensuring that all Hershey’s and Reese’s offerings are consistent with their brand’s classic milk and dark chocolate recipes”. The changes are planned to come into effect by next year

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Put away the Aperol and raise a glass to Hugo spritz, the drink of the summer

Pub gardens and bar terraces have been awash with a sea of orange in recent years as Italy’s love of Aperol spritz spread to the UK. But this year the cocktail’s cousin, a Hugo spritz, will be the drink of the summer, according to supermarkets and bars.It is already being served across the country, including at Sea Containers on the banks of the Thames and Mayfair’s swanky Claridge’s hotel in London, 20 Stories bar in Manchester and the Bridge Tavern in Newcastle. Wetherspoons has the cocktail on its menu nationwide.“In the past year, we have noted that there has been a wider shift among our guests towards drinks with lower alcohol percentages, particularly during the day – a Hugo spritz fits rather neatly into this space,” said George Raju, director of bars at Claridge’s

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Helen Goh’s recipe for ricotta, rum and raisin cake | The sweet spot

This is a cake for the long, ambling tail-end of an Easter lunch. It’s gently scented with orange and vanilla, lightened by ricotta, and studded with rum-soaked raisins that bring bursts of sweetness to each slice. Ideally, they’d be soaked overnight to plump them into something luscious, but if time gets away from you, take a shortcut: put the raisins and rum in a microwave-safe bowl, zap for 20–30 seconds, then leave to cool and absorb. The chocolate glaze is optional; on days when you want something simpler (or lighter), a generous sifting of icing sugar is all this cake needs. Serve with a small glass of grappa or something similarly warming for a quietly perfect way to bring a feast to a close

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Cocoa-crazy: chocolate-infused liqueurs deserve their own moment

Among my minor childhood traumas was the time my dad returned from a business trip to Belgium with a smart box of assorted chocolates (cue tiny violins). Expecting caramel, I bit into a truffle and was met by an explosion of very boozy liqueur. The box seemed to be an exciting change from the usual duty-free Toblerone, but after this incident, truffle assortments have always struck me as deeply unsafe. (I have tried liqueur-filled chocolates since, but still remain flummoxed by them.)The Guardian’s journalism is independent

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Baked cheesy smoked haddock and lemon icebox pudding: Henry Harris’ alternative Easter lunch

Sometimes all you want is a hot, bubbling dish and a spoon, and for me today’s cheesy haddock is that dish – a 15-minute supper to be enjoyed in front of the telly with a salad or a large bowl of hot buttered peas. Add a lemony, biscuity iced dessert, and you have a light, very easy and enjoyable supper that’s almost the perfect close to a long Easter weekend.Choose your smoked haddock carefully: you want large, thick fillets of undyed fish. Stating the obvious, here, but a good fishmonger will have this; a supermarket never. The creme fraiche must be a French, naturally soured cream, too, becausethe cheaper English versions coagulate when heat is applied, resulting in an unpleasant, watery gunk

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Rachel Roddy’s Easter cannelloni with spinach, peas, ricotta and mozzarella – recipe

Fresh sheets smelling of fresh air or fabric softener (or both) with hospital corners are one of life’s great pleasures. As are fresh sheets of egg pasta – the sort that comes in squat boxes protected by clingfilm and found in the fridge section alongside ravioli. They are also one of the most useful and certainly the most multi-talented of all the pasta shapes.That they are labelled lasagne is limiting; of course, they can be lasagne, but they could just as easily be numerous other shapes. The most easy-going of which is maltagliati, meaning badly cut, which tells you everything you need to know about the approach required as you cut them (using a knife, pizza wheel or pair of scissors) into uneven bits that are ideal in all sorts of soups, but especially those with beans

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As Australian food prices rise, ‘robust’ cauliflower and cabbage are April’s best value fruit and veg

As roast and soup season starts, it is “a good time for brassicas”, says Graham Gee, senior buyer at the Happy Apple in Melbourne – “cauliflower and broccoli”. “You get a good supply of cabbage, kale, silverbeet and leeks too. All the robust veggies.”While they might not be ultra cheap, he says “a whole cauliflower can go a long way. You can feed a lot of people with them

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How to turn a leftover roast lamb bone into Wales’ national dish – recipe | Waste not

Cawl is Wales’ gift to the world of thrifty, slow-cooked broths and, like all great peasant dishes, it’s seasonal, versatile and immensely practical. A few years ago, Food & Drink Wales invited me to create two food sustainability toolkits, one for hospitality and one for the public, with both celebrating Welsh produce and recipes. This led me to explore Wales’ national dishes and discover cawl (or lobscows, the northern Welsh name for the dish) properly for the first time. Inspired by Welsh culinary legends Dudley Newbery and Tomos Parry’s recipes, it’s the perfect way to turn lamb leftovers, or even just a bone, into a hearty meal.The magic of cawl lies in its sheer simplicity

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Australian supermarket Easter eggs taste test: ‘The quality of Easter chocolate is simply worse’

Nicholas Jordan goes on the hunt for good Easter eggs. After nibbling through 29 products, he is glad the ovum ordeal is overGet our weekend culture and lifestyle emailIf you value our independent journalism, we hope you’ll consider supporting us todayWhen I was a kid, chocolate usually came with some kind of regulatory statement: “you can have some if you finish your dinner”, or “don’t eat it all at once”. But at Easter, that went out the window. The amount of chocolate I ate then is barely believable.Now that adult me is making the decisions, I can eat chocolate whenever I want, with the fervour of an unaccompanied labrador in a pet food shop

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What a slip-up! The shop in Orkney that accidentally ordered 38,000 bananas

Name: Banana bonanza.Age: A few days old – and getting riper by the minute.Appearance: Try to imagine a lot of bananas.Easy. How many bananas is a lot of bananas? About 38,000 bananas