Rob Cross opens up on struggles after second-round win against Ian White
Rob Cross doesn’t want to say what he saw at the children’s hospital in Cologne a couple of weeks ago.Some of the stories were “horrific”, he confides, but in any case they’re not his stories to tell.All he knows is that he went along with a few other players, after appearing in an exhibition the previous night, and it changed him.“You see what people are going through,” he says.“And it puts life in perspective for people whose lives are sort of OK.
Whose kids are OK.Sometimes we have to find a bit of good.It made me realise how lucky I am in life.There’s always someone out there going through something worse than what you’re going through.That’s why you need to talk.
”And Cross wants to talk now, about what he’s been going through.Maybe the aftermath of a routine 3-1 second-round win against Ian White at the world championship is the right time to do it, and maybe it isn’t.He doesn’t want to get into the weeds of it, and he certainly doesn’t claim to have all the answers.But talking helped him, and so he reasons it might help someone else too.For the 2018 world champion, 2025 has been a year of nightmares.
He had a bad Premier League.He’s dropped from No 4 in the world to No 20.He hasn’t made the quarter-finals at any major.In the summer he entered into an Individual Voluntary Arrangement over unpaid taxes of more than £450,000.Last week his long-time manager Rob Bain, a man Cross describes as “like a father”, was taken to hospital.
But of course with mental health struggles, there is rarely a straightforward cause and effect.“I would have had these problems even if it weren’t darts,” he says.“Doesn’t matter where you’ve come from, what you’ve got.If you’re not happy, you’re not happy.I can play the Billy Big Bollocks, but it isn’t the case.
We can only wear so much as human beings.“I’ve suffered with it a long time before darts.We all get low, and we grow up thinking to ourselves that we should be stronger.That you can’t show that side.And that’s where I’m at.
I’m guilty of not expressing myself to the people that I trust with my life.Anyone who wants to help, you need to speak up.It’s going to eat you away eventually.”And so for all his struggles on the oche, for most of this year Cross has been trying to search for himself.He drifted in and out of tournaments, found practice a chore.
He went on medication for his ADHD, which – and he makes clear this was a personal choice – he stopped taking just before the start of this tournament.“It is the way to go, but it just cuts a few things out when you want to be clear,” he says.“I think if I’d stayed on it, I’d have been out first round.“I just thought I’m better off being mates with the person inside rather than trying to shut him off, no emotions.I feel OK.
It brings the hyperness out instead of trying to lock it away.I think I’m fixed.I just can’t switch off, so we need to sort that out.”In which context perhaps it seems of only the slightest relevance that Cross has been in very decent form here, as good as he has looked all year.Now he can enjoy the festive season with his four children and look forward to a last-32 game against Damon Heta.
“If I’d have lost today, it would have been a miserable Christmas,” he admits.“Would have gone home and sulked like a big baby.Now I get to enjoy Christmas with my babies.It’ll mean the world to me.”Longer term, the jigsaw remains incomplete.
Unless he reaches the semi-finals at least he will start 2026 outside the top 16, and thus face a scramble to qualify for the big tournaments,He can probably forget about the Premier League for the time being,And the taxman still needs to be repaid,But if darts has given him a certain grief, darts still offers the surest way out of it,“The biggest thing for me,” he says, “is when I enjoy it.
When I light that buzz.Hit that shot, under scrutiny.Feel the adrenaline.The money won’t change my life.Nothing could change my life.
But winning this is the pinnacle of the game.And that’s the most important bit.”In the UK, Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123 or email jo@samaritans.org.You can contact the mental health charity Mind by calling 0300 123 3393 or visiting mind.
org.uk
Cosmopolitan Christmas: Stosie Madi’s French-African-Lebanese Christmas lunch – recipes
I was born in west Africa, and brought up between there, France and the UK in a French-Lebanese-British family. Unsurprisingly, then, our Christmas lunch was more than a bit diverse: my father always insisted on some British and Lebanese elements, while my mother contributed French dishes and technique; west African produce was also a must, because the house would be full of all nationalities, including our African family. Not only that, but our Christmas would invariably start with a guest list of about 20, and another 20 or so waifs and strays would always then turn up in need of feeding and watering. Today’s dishes were part of our regular seasonal festivities, as good in the sunshine as they are robust enough for a chilly British winter.Lebanese feasts always feature some form of pie, and sambouseks are tiny little ones with various fillings
From a showstopping pavlova to a £7 sherry: what top chefs bring to Christmas dinner
Looking for a great supermarket champagne? Need an easy recipe to take to a party? Or just some really good cheese… Yotam Ottolenghi, Giorgio Locatelli, Ixta Belfrage and others reveal the best snacks, drinks and desserts to make and buy for the big dayThe Guardian’s journalism is independent. We will earn a commission if you buy something through an affiliate link. Learn more.Christmas is a time of overwhelming choice, especially when it comes to food. So, to help you navigate the festive feasting, we asked 16 top chefs and cooks to tell us what they buy or make to give to the people brave enough to invite them over
A fresh take on wine pairings for Christmas dessert
It may well be that you already have a drink that you traditionally like to sip on after dinner (or lunch), and who am I to tell you that needs to change? Even so, I have a few ideas for drinks you might like to try instead.The Guardian’s journalism is independent. We will earn a commission if you buy something through an affiliate link. Learn more.Let’s start with the classics
How to eat, drink and be merry – while pregnant – at Christmas
For a festival with childbirth at its religious heart, it is perverse how much of our traditional Christmas spread isn’t recommended for pregnant women. Pre-pregnancy, this was not something I’d clocked. I was the soft cheese supremo, canape queen – at my happiest with a smoked trout blini in one hand and a champagne flute in the other. Then one day in October, two blue lines appeared on a test result and everything started to change: my body, my future and most pressingly my Christmas.The Guardian’s journalism is independent
Jeremy Lee’s recipe for almond, chocolate and prune tart
A recipe box was rifled through, but, alas, much like shopping for a present last minute, nothing leapt to the fore. Out of the corner of an eye I spied an old folder of pudding menus, all stained and tattered. A wonder at how this might have escaped notice was soon dispelled – unsurprising, really, given the usual state of my desk and shelves – and the page on which it fell open revealed the scribbles for a midwinter pudding menu. And, just like that, as if the scent rose from the page itself, came a memory of an almond, chocolate, walnut and prune tart being lifted from the oven, all mahogany hued and with a few bubbles bursting from the pieces of chocolate among the prunes peeking out.My appetite for almond tart has never waned; be it in a restaurant kitchen or at home, an almond tart is nigh-on inevitable
Creme brulee and chocolate bundt cake: Nicola Lamb’s Christmas crowdpleasers – recipes
Even though our to-do lists are longer and our homes busier than ever, there’s something about Christmas that gives us the extra chutzpah to bake. And not just any baking, but baking for a crowd. So, with this in mind, here are two crowdpleasing recipes – a rich hazelnut “Nutcracker” creme brulee and a resplendent chocolate fondant bundt cake – with a few make-ahead and shortcut secrets to give you a head start.Serve this rich, decadent dessert warm from the oven in the centre of the table, piled with ice-cream (and perhaps pouring cream, too – why not? It’s Christmas!). The batter can be made and kept in the fridge for up to 24 hours, then baked from chilled; add an extra 10 minutes to the cooking time if you do so, though
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