Ok, that’s enough from this page for one day, I’ll see you back here when the caravan pitches up in Melbourne,Time to redirect you to the more considered content from the likes of Geoff Lemon, Barney Ronay, and first, Ali Martin,“Maybe I’m clutching at straws but surely managing to take the third Test into the fifth day constitutes a moral victory for England in the Ashes?” pleads Colum Fordham,“Ah how sweet is the taste of victory!”Jim Lines asks the question that once began as a taunt but must now be given serious sporting (if not financial) consideration,“With the anomalous exception of 2010/11, the Aussie-hosted Ashes have been embarrassingly one-sided for decades.

Given the calendar pressures combined with the diminishing status of first-class cricket, at what point does is it reduced to a three-Test series?”Travis Head and Alex Carey wrested this match away from England yesterday, but the tourists could still take some hope from engineering an Australian collapse from 311-4 to 349 all out.With momentum behind them and Ben Stokes in the line-up, an unlikely target of 435 was not beyond the realms of possibility, but first the brittle top order would have to survive a testing 20 minute spell before lunch.Ben Duckett was unable to do just that, continuing his wretched tour with another soft dismissal.The afternoon session saw Ollie Pope come and go quickly, and demand serious interrogation of England’s selectors should be be seen in his playing whites on Boxing Day in Melbourne.The other Englishman battling for his place at the start of the tour, Zak Crawley, seems likely to end it more secure than ever of his status.

Today he compiled a studied 85, building a series of promising partnerships before he became one of Nathan Lyon’s three victims,The spinner turned the match his side’s way with the scalps of Crawley and Ben Stokes to beautiful deliveries, and Harry Brook to the kind of brain fade that is become the hallmark of the batter’s career,Amongst all that Pat Cummins dismissed Joe Root for the 13th time in Tests, Mitchell Starc was warned twice for running onto the protected part of the strip, and Cummins may have rolled an ankle in the outfield, hardly bowling in the final session,The battle for the Ashes survives another day, but that is only because Australia were denied the time to administer the last rites this evening,England’s performance was full of bright moments but as is now customary Australia’s superior skill shone through in the end.

63rd over: England 207-6 (Smith 2, Jacks 11) Jacks survives the final over of the day, despite Head beating his outside edge, and England reach stumps.62nd over: England 207-6 (Smith 2, Jacks 11) After 17 dot balls without any indication England cared about scoring Smith is able to work a delivery through the ring on the legside for a single.And like London buses two come along at once! One over left in the day’s play.“Bazball has failed, but no differently than its predecessors,” explains Lindsay Went.“In England’s 34(!) Test defeats in Australia since 1989, there has not been a single close loss involved.

There’s a lone 5 wicket loss and a solo 98 run loss.As for the rest, there’s six innings defeats, eleven by 200 runs or more, nine by 8 wickets or more with the remaining eight falling in between.And people stay up all night to watch this? That’s devotion - or insanity!”61st over: England 205-6 (Smith 1, Jacks 10) Head races through an over Jadeja-style as Jacks joins Smith in dead-batting everything.The Ashes will remain alive, technically, for another day.60th over: England 205-6 (Smith 1, Jacks 10) Smith is hell bent on getting to stumps, crawling to one from 25 deliveries.

It’s not without risk though, playing back to Lyon and tickling an edge that avoids an ugly bowled dismissal and catching Carey unawares with the keeper already rising to collect the bouncing ball and unable to pouch the catch off his laces.Colin Brushwood with some inconvenient truths for the future of English cricket.“After every Ashes away stuffing the ECB goes all Yes Minister: a review, a white paper, a shake up blah blah blah.But nothing will make a difference.England will never contain a team of housing estate players who might get stuck right in to the Aussies.

Cricket may as well be croquet or show jumping in the cities.Grassroots? Sold to developers for flats.59th over: England 205-6 (Smith 1, Jacks 10) Australia review a Head delivery that straightens and beats Jacks on his outside edge.They think there was a feather but DRS disagrees.Nathan Lyon’s 68 Test wickets at the Adelaide Oval is now the joint-second best return by a bowler at an Australian Test ground.

Shane Warne also has 68 at the Gabba, behind only Dennis Lillee’s 82 at the MCG.58th over: England 199-6 (Smith 0, Jacks 5) Jacks dabs away three Lyon deliveries then sweeps uppishly for a single.“My mate came around today and forced Francis Ford Coppola’s Megalopolis into the Blu Ray player,” begins Chris Paraskevas.“A sprawling, egotistical, overblown, irreverent financial and critical disaster that has provided the perfect thematic compliment to England’s impending series defeat and the collapse of the Bazball Empire (playing on the laptop with the movie as soundtrack).Who cares about a competitive series? Leave that sentiment for the India visits: this is all about getting to 5-0! Long live Bazalopilis.

”57th over: England 198-6 (Smith 0, Jacks 4) Australia bring Head back into the attack, presumably goading England into some more comedy dismissals before sundown,Smith doesn’t take the bait, dobbing away a maiden,56th over: England 198-6 (Smith 0, Jacks 4) Jacks may well be a golfer, keen for a Sunday tee time at Kooyonga,He aims a couple of lusty reverse sweeps at Lyon, connecting with one that reaches the cover boundary, but in a manner that brings into question his awareness of the match situation,55th over: England 194-6 (Smith 0, Jacks 0) For fear of returning to the weeds of an English postmortem, the past two dismissals are examples of Australia’s brilliance more than England’s failings.

A brilliance made even more stark when the spinners of both teams are compared side-by-side.However, 177-3 becomes 194-6 as a direct consequence of Brook’s latest brain fade…Smith sees off a Boland maiden.Presumably the English keeper is not a golfer.54th over: England 194-6 (Smith 0, Jacks 0) That was another superb demonstration of Lyon’s ability to generate drift, dragging Crawley out of position and opening the gate to allow the ball to jag through.He almost repeats the trick to Jacks to conclude a wicket maiden but gets too much purchase off the surface.

It’s not my rhetorical questions causing England to collapse, it’s Tony McKnight’s attention,“I know this makes me a poor fan, and I know it’s fanciful, but I’ve gone away from the game 3 times because it’s too stressful (they couldn’t could they?), and then each time I come back, ‘just for a minute,’ just checking in’, we lose a wicket, (Root, Brook, Stokes),Apologies,”With the coda, in case we were unconvinced of his superpower: “you can add Crawley to the list,”Why do I ask these rhetorical questions? Lyon sends down a textbook delivery that beats Crawley through the gate.

Carey gathers it with the minimum of fuss and whips off the bails with the England opener still balanced on his front foot a metre outside his crease,The end is nigh,53rd over: England 194-5 (Crawley 85, Smith 0) Crawley continues his lone hand, whipping Boland to the midwicket fence for a boundary,Then he rotates the strike to reveal a typically skittish-looking Smith,There’s half-an-hour of play remaining today.

Are we coming back tomorrow?Lyon comes around the wicket to Crawley now and again the batter tries to sweep (reverse) the opening delivery.He fails to connect, raising the prospect of an lbw.He goes again next ball, this time sending a decent stroke out to the point sweeper to move into the 80s.Stokes is still watchful, dotting from the crease, but even in a hyper-defensive mode he can’t keep out a Lyon pearler! From around the wicket the ball drifts onto leg stump, draws the England skipper forward, bounces and spins past the shoulder of the defensive stroke and clips the top of off-stump.That’s why he’s the GOAT.

Masterful delivery,52nd over: England 189-5 (Crawley 80)51st over: England 188-4 (Crawley 79, Stokes 5) Scott Boland replaces the out-of-sorts Starc but he overpitches to Stokes who batters him Lara-like through the covers with a massive stride and runner’s lunge,Speaking of West Indian greats, the superbly named Andy Roberts has come steaming in from the sight-screen,“Watching and reading along here, enjoying the cricket so far,” he begins, softening us up, “but I need to get something off my chest,At the risk of sounding like a pedant of the first order, I can’t stand it when people talk about Australia “winning the Ashes” during this 25/26 series, or “winning the Ashes” in England.

Australia can’t win the Ashes because they already hold them.They will continue to hold them until England can muster a definitive series victory.Until then, Australia will RETAIN the Ashes.They RETAINED the Ashes in England by drawing the series, and are likely to RETAIN the Ashes in this Australian summer with a series win.When people get it wrong, they are fundamentally misunderstanding the nature of an Ashes contest.

It is not just another series that you win lose or draw; there is a prize that needs to be won - wrested from the holder clearly and totally.The outcome of the Test series - win, lose or draw - is secondary to who wins or retains the Ashes.Okay, rant over.I’ll get back to relaxing by the pool and waiting for the Australian win.I’m calling 150 runs.

”50th over: England 183-4 (Crawley 78, Stokes 1) Crawley has dealt with Lyon so far by sweeping him early in an over, and he does just that again, whipping him powerfully for four through square-leg.Thereafter the bowler adjusts a fraction shorter allowing the tall batter to play him from the crease and pick his spot for an easy single.Stokes remains watchful.Gervase Greene adds more meat to the bones of the “why don’t Australia get pelters for not winning in England” question.“Australia in England has almost always been competitive, whereas England are rarely so over here.

Lest we forget those last six tours (and there’s a sample bias there, as it dates from the demise of the all-time great Australian dynasty) saw two series drawn and three of four series narrowly lost.The corresponding English tours Down Under were for the most part laughably one-sided.2006’s 0-5, 2013’s 0-5, 2017’s 0-4 and 2021’s 0-4.Or to put it another way, overall in the six series in England, England won 14 Tests and Australia 8.In the past six series in Australia, England won 3 Test and Australia 19.

And the way things are going, by this time tomorrow it’ll be 0-3 in this series.As a Test cricket fan I wish it were more even always.But generally speaking, it simply hasn’t been.Hopefully the next MCC review of KPIs might factor this issue into their mix.”49th over: England 178-4 (Crawley 73, Stokes 1) “This is the best I’ve ever seen Crawley bat,” purrs Justin Langer, offering the opener a backhanded compliment amidst a thorough takedown of England’s inability to bat for time.

Stokes is actually the man on srtike during the over, allowing another off-colour Starc over to mostly pass through to the keeper,A lovely two act play from Philip Rebbeck:17:04: “‘Hoist by his own petard’ is already past tense Jonathan,And I hope it doesn’t happen to Brook,”17:05: “Oh dear,”48th over: England 178-4 (Crawley 73, Stokes 1) That’s the fourth time in six innings Brook has got himself in, and on three of those occasions he has got himself out.

The margin between success and failure is wafer thin.Lol.Option b it is then.Nathan Lyon is recalled, Harry Brook misses the reverse sweep, and off balance he can scarcely believe the ball cannoned into his off stump.Another ugly dismissal for the prodigiously talented Englishman.

47th over: England 176-3 (Crawley 72, Brook 30) Starc looks a shadow of his usual self bowling without rhythm from around the wicket,Brook is either a) starting to look very dangerous and ready to prove his class, or b) just about to be hoisted by his own petard,“I have a very basic understanding of cricket, so just wondering, since Australia hasn’t won an Ashes in England in a very long time either, why doesn’t Australia seem to get judged as harshly?” Very fair question Rina,I think because around those series Australia have won the World Test Championship, a bunch of 50-over World Cups, and only lost by fine margins (2023 & 2019 both 2-2 draws, and 2015 2-3),There hasn’t been the abject failure on the scale England tend to deliver on a quadrennial basis.

46th over: England 171-3 (Crawley 70, Brook 28) After 30-or-so deliveries #diggingin Harry Brook has started to resemble his usual self,He takes Head for seven runs from three deliveries, including a powerfully struck reverse sweep for four,Crawley moves into the 70s with what is becoming a characteristically straight bat and straightforward off drive,WinViz is still drunk, reckoning England have a 13% chance of victory,Pretty sure it’s been at least 10% all innings.

This article includes content hosted on embed.bsky.app.We ask for your permission before anything is loaded, as the provider may be using cookies and other technologies.To view this content, click 'Allow and continue'