Will this ‘Doritos-inspired’ hot cross bun cause some spicy full-scale anarchy – or is it merely weird-smelling clickbait?
Alyx, I tried one of the orange bread-things you left in the office kitchen.What was that?That, Julia, was the apotheosis of this year’s Easter rush of frankenfoods, a “Doritos-inspired” cheesy jalapeño hot cross bun.The trend of turning everything into a hot cross bun and turning hot cross buns into everything has been going for a while now, and this year the world’s biggest food companies got on board like brands at a pride parade in 2015.A savoury take is the most obvious of the not-crosses, which is why I bought it, but I also walked past a shelf filled with discounted Iced Vovo hot cross buns, alongside a bunch of other Arnott’s biscuits.If I’d gone to Woolworths instead of Coles, I could have picked up various CadburyxHXB collabs; and Aldi is doing a carrot cake number.
Australia isn’t alone in our novelty bun affliction, by the way.Now, a question for you: what did you think of it?Sign up for the fun stuff with our rundown of must-reads, pop culture and tips for the weekend, every Saturday morningI am passionately opposed to Doritos in chip-form, but strangely I really enjoyed this spicy hot cross bun iteration.Is there something wrong with me?I’m not saying you’ve got a broken palate, but you are close to the sole dissenter here – only one other person thought they weren’t bad.Our colleagues called the buns “so wrong, with or without butter” and “a bad version of a Bakers Delight cheesy roll with a weird smell too”.Many remarked on the artificial, “Pizza Shapes” odour.
One likened it to the unholy progeny of a sexual union between a Dorito and a marshmallow, while another said: “It tastes exactly like I imagined – an inappropriate blend of two completely different things.” Those with higher expectations had them thwarted: “I was hoping for a cheesy scone or jalapeño cornbread, but winced just at the smell of it.”Personally I found them claggy, unevenly spicy, synthetically sweet and skimpy on the dried fruit (jalapeño is, technically, a fruit).After I put one in the office panini maker, it compressed into a crispy puck with a gooey centre and some of the parmesan notes came out, so it ate a little like a meagre, maltodextrin-coated toasty.A perfectly acceptable 3pm office lunch.
I really feel they missed a trick by not making the cross out of cheese though.Great idea – Coles, take note! But now I’m questioning everything – not just my own sense of taste, but the very essence of a hot cross bun.If something savoury and sans-raisins fits within the hot cross bun umbrella, where does it end?Starting an authenticity bunfight is kind of the point when it comes to culinary clickbait.If you can get people to try it once, their job is done.That means it never ends, only escalates.
You could respond by opting out and becoming a hot cross bun purist who insists only sultanas, candied orange and cinnamon qualify – or you could embrace hot cross anarchy.Next year, make a cross out of avocado mash on a tray of nachos and call it a guac cross bun.
UK car production falls 17% as industry warns of ‘worrying’ decline
Fewer cars rolled off UK production lines in February in what the industry called an “extremely worrying” slump even before the impact of the Iran war was felt.Vehicle production was 17% lower last month on the same period in 2025, according to the Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders, as exports dropped sharply.A further decline is expected in March, after the war sent global energy prices soaring and further dented consumer demand, a double blow for carmakers.Mike Hawes, chief executive of the SMMT, said: “Another decline for UK vehicle production and exports is extremely worrying, given these figures pre-date the crisis in the Middle East. While the sector has made efforts to build resilience into its logistics and supply chains post-Covid, the conflict adds further strain
Almost half a million Lloyds customers had personal data exposed in IT glitch
Lloyds Banking Group exposed the personal data of nearly 500,000 customers in an IT glitch that left people’s payments, account details and national insurance numbers visible to other users, a committee of MPs has revealed.A letter from Lloyds, published by MPs on the Treasury select committee on Friday, blamed the glitch on a software defect introduced during an IT update to its Lloyds, Halifax and Bank of Scotland mobile banking apps overnight into 12 March.The bank explained that customers would have had to be looking at their app within “small fractions of a second” of other users in order to access their details.However, it still meant up to 447,936 customers were potentially able to view private information of other users, with Lloyds adding that about 114,182 people ended up clicking into transactions that revealed account details, national insurance numbers or payment references.Even people who were not Lloyds Banking Group customers may have had their transaction details exposed, the bank said
Five firms including Autotrader and Just Eat investigated over fake review failings
The UK competition watchdog has launched investigations into five companies including Autotrader and Just Eat over concerns they have not done enough to tackle fake and misleading online reviews.The Competition and Markets Authority (CMA), which has previously investigated the tech companies Amazon and Google, said its latest crackdown includes the funeral services operator Dignity, the review company Feefo and the restaurant chain Pasta Evangelists.The CMA said that in the case of Autotrader and Feefo it was looking at whether a number of one-star reviews, moderated by Feefo, were excluded from being published on the car-selling platform and therefore did not give consumers a full picture of other customers’ experiences.The Dignity investigation focuses on whether staff were asked to write positive reviews about the company’s cremation services.Just Eat, the food delivery company, is being investigated over concerns that its system “inflated certain restaurants’ and grocers’ star ratings”
US markets see biggest slump since start of US-Israel war on Iran
US markets saw their biggest slump since the start of the US-Israel war with Iran on Thursday as Donald Trump said the conflict’s impact on oil prices had not been as bad as he expected.The Dow closed 450 points down, while the S&P 500 dipped 1.7%. The tech-heavy Nasdaq fell 2.3%, plunging into correction territory, which happens when an index falls at least 10% below its most recent peak
The Middle East price shock hasn’t hit Next – yet | Nils Pratley
In the context of Next, which has just reported full-year pre-tax profits of £1.16bn, an estimated £15m of extra fuel and air freight costs arising from the Middle East conflict is tiny. The sum, which in any case assumes disruption lasts three months, can be lost in the wash, or more precisely “offset by savings elsewhere”.The chief executive, Simon Wolfson, a boss who tends to err on the side of caution when guiding on profits, saw no reason not to add £8m to this year’s number as a mechanical read-through from last year’s outcome. If there wasn’t a war on, one can assume there would have been a proper profit upgrade
NS&I chief executive replaced in ‘fresh start’ over missing savings crisis; bad day for markets – as it happened
The boss of National Savings and Investments appears to have been dismissed over the £476m savings scandal at the bank.Pensions minister Torsten Bell has told MPs that he has appointed Sir Jim Harra, a senior civil servant, to take over as the chief executive of NS&I on an interim basis, replacing Dax Harkins.Bell says Harra, a former first permanent secretary at HMRC, will provide “a fresh start for NS&I”, following its failure to trace missing savings belonging to customers who have died.Updating MPs on the crisis over deceased customers’ savings, Bell says he wants to make sure NS&I has “the very best leadership” in place.Bell tells MPs: double quotation markSir Jim will undertake a review over the next three months to spell out in detail the background to this tracing problem and to set out what lessons must be learned for NSI going forward
More than 6m vapes and pods discarded weekly in UK despite single-use ban, study finds
UK government must urgently apologise for forced adoption, MPs say
NHS bosses say resident doctors’ strike will cause ‘maximum harm’
Spanish woman who won legal battle for right to euthanasia has assisted death
London has England’s highest levels of child poverty, data shows
Man who murdered pregnant girlfriend has 42-year term increased to whole-life order