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Claire Hooper: ‘People have different forms of therapy. Songs for the Deaf by Queens of the Stone Age is mine’

about 11 hours ago
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The premise of your new standup show, Fun Show xx, is that you are not a fun person.What is the least fun thing about you?The minute my husband leaves the house, I turn the music off.I love silence.For my 40th birthday my husband, my two babies and I flew to Adelaide and hired a car to drive to the Barossa.My husband said, “It’s your birthday, you get to choose the playlist!” and I said, “Just complete silence please.

” So we drove in silence for 90 minutes and that’s all I wanted,I’m not looking for life to be more fun,I just want less of everything, thank you,My dream is five hours of uninterrupted thinking time,Which book, album or film do you always return to and why?Queens of the Stone Age’s album Songs for the Deaf.

When it came out, I was getting my shit together – I was no longer engaged to a guy that I wasn’t going to marry and I knew what I wanted to do.Nearly 10 years ago, I did a rage room and they asked “What do you want to listen to while you smash stuff?” And I said, “Complete silence, please.” Like, I’m not right.And they went, “I think you should put something on.” So I put on that album.

And I think I’ve accidentally loaded way too much meaning on it,That CD is the only CD in my car,So when I do a road trip, I will listen to nothing, and then I will play the first three tracks on that album and repeat the third track three times in a row,And I will bawl the whole way through it and then I’ll just shut it off and drive in silence again,Other people have different forms of therapy, but this album is the only way I can access my emotions in a safe way.

I very rarely listen to the end of the album,Isn’t that mad? I’m really afraid of this being in the public domain,If you could change the size of any animal to keep as a pet, what would it be?The bigger the better,If anything, I think all dogs are too small,What is the most chaotic thing that has ever happened to you on stage?Honestly, there’s been some rippers.

I once did a corporate gig for a construction company where everyone was sitting at round tables, which means most people are not facing you,It was not a raised stage,The room was L-shaped and next to a noisy kitchen, so they couldn’t hear,There were balloon centrepieces and some giant pillars, so nobody could see,And I also got introduced by them going, “Oh, I hope you do better than the guy we had last time”, which is the biggest red flag of all.

It was so awful.I was getting paid for 20 minutes, but I was so relieved to get off the stage.Then the band kicked off and some guy who worked at this company thanked me, then grabbed me and made me slow dance with him for the first song.To have battled through 20 horrendous minutes and be like, finally I’m free – then be physically dragged by the hand and made to dance with him, in the centre of the stage: it was humiliation on top of humiliation.Sign up for the fun stuff with our rundown of must-reads, pop culture and tips for the weekend, every Saturday morningWhat is the strangest thing you’ve done for love?My husband [podcaster Wade Duffin] and I got engaged five weeks after meeting.

He’s the love of my life so I don’t feel like I’ve done anything especially strange,But we knew that it would worry friends and family, so we didn’t really announce it,I actually didn’t think marriage was a thing I was going to do – I’d been engaged and called it off like three weeks before the wedding back in my 20s,But within a week of meeting me, he was like, “I’m going to ask you to marry me one day, but I know it’s too soon,” I was like, “Fine!” Five weeks went and he said, “Is it still too soon?” And I said, “Nah!” It was very unromantic, but also incredibly romantic.

We got married in 2008 and we’ve been together ever since,Do you have a nemesis?No!That was definitely the face of a woman that has a nemesis,Well, how do you define nemesis? There is a person who I don’t wish well,If they enter the room, I think, is there a way to get out of this room?That’s tantalising,Who is the most underrated comedian?Bronwyn Kuss is an absolute genius at comedy, but she has at least received critical acclaim – so can you say she’s underrated? I feel she should be touring in giant venues and everyone should know her name.

But at least she has got the awards and the reviews.This almost feels like a controversial call, but Pete Helliar is a great example of someone who other comedians forget is actually really good at comedy.I do it! But he is smart and professional and he has incredibly good comedy instincts.His shows are really funny.What has been your most cringeworthy run-in with a famous person?Oh, shit, this one was awful.

When I was working in commercial radio, they’d send me along to a press launch to ask a question and get a good radio grab.Anyway: Shane Warne did not like me.He had designed a Matchbox toy car and there was a press conference for it and I can’t remember what my exact question was, but it was essentially, “Is it true that when men design cars, they’re modelling them on something else?” I couldn’t believe how little he wanted any part of that question.I sat back down and went, “Wow, he doesn’t like having a joke with a comedian.” Like, I want my Matchbox car taken seriously, how dare you!If you had a sandwich named after you, what would be in it?It would be a flour tortilla with crunchy peanut butter rolled up in it like a swiss roll.

I know that’s not a sandwich, but that’s what I eat and nobody else I’ve ever met does that.I really enjoy crunch in the doughiness.I love that it is not messy and you can eat it while you’re driving.I’m all about efficiency.It is extremely calorie dense.

But if you are too busy for a meal, it will give you energy that will get you to the end of your night and you can eat vegetables tomorrow,Where is the weirdest place you’ve been recognised?I was getting a colonoscopy a few years ago,So I changed into the robe and little socks and walked into the surgery and the nurse – and I’m gonna name-check her – Narelle went, “Oh! I’ve been watching you on The Great Australian Bake Off!” And I swear this is true, because you never say the right thing in these moments, but I replied, “Get ready for a very different viewing experience, Narelle,”Claire Hooper’s Fun Show xx is touring Melbourne international comedy festival 26 March – 19 April, Sydney comedy festival 9–10 May and Brisbane comedy festival 14–17 May,
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Helen Goh’s recipe for peanut and blackcurrant thumbprint cookies | The sweet spot

Niki Segnit writes in The Flavour Thesaurus that, while grape jelly is the familiar partner to peanut butter in the classic PBJ, she thinks blackcurrant, with its sharper, more complex character, would be a far better match for the fatty and salty peanuts. I couldn’t agree more, though I’ll admit I’m not entirely impartial: blackcurrant is my favourite jam. Here, it’s spooned into the centre of a tender, peanut-crusted shortbread, where it bakes into a glossy, slightly chewy jewel that sits in perfect contrast to the crumbly, buttery biscuit. It’s the sort of small pleasure I find myself returning to again and again.Prep 15 min, plus chilling and cooling Cook 35 min Makes 13110g unsalted butter, at room temperature50g caster sugar¼ tsp salt 100g plain flour, sifted60g ground almonds 1 tsp vanilla extract 60g salted roasted peanuts 60g blackcurrant jamPut the butter, sugar and salt in the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the paddle attachment and beat for two minutes on medium–high speed, until pale and creamy

2 days ago
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Spring has officially sprung – reawaken your palate with zingy, zesty seasonal ingredients

After what felt like months and months of endless rain this winter, in the UK at least, the arrival of spring is more welcome than ever this year. It’s undeniable that a few days of sunshine and milder temperatures change everything: my mood, my palate, my dinner table (see below for my achilles heel: serveware).And to mark the change in season, the Guardian is launching a new seasonal food magazine. This Saturday will see the arrival of the Guardian Food Quarterly, for which I have showcased crab – one of my favourite spring arrivals. I have written five recipes, including a speedy, spicy crab cake banh mi with quick pickles, and a hot cheesy crab and chive dip inspired by the American south

3 days ago
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There’s more to Mexican spirits than tequila

“We were amazed,” wrote the Spanish conquistador Bernal Díaz del Castillo as he beheld the extent of the Aztec empire in 1521. “Some of our soldiers even asked whether the things that we saw were not a dream.” I remember feeling a similar vertigo when I first saw the wall of agave spirits at the long-since-closed Los Angeles mezcaleria Petty Cash more than a decade ago. Agave spirits are distilled from the fermented heart (or piña) of the agave plant – not a cactus, but a succulent, like aloe vera or that thing dying on your windowsill.The Guardian’s journalism is independent

3 days ago
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Buzz kill: US breweries shutter as fanfare over craft beers appears to fade

In the early 2000s, Chris Bell, then a student at University of Colorado Boulder, followed a common path among people interested in brewing beer. He started doing so at home, then spent years working at established craft beer makers Long Trail Brewing in Vermont and Avery Brewing in Colorado before opening Call to Arms Brewing Company in 2015 in Denver.In a crowded market, the business was successful. Its More Like Bore-O-Phyll beer won a gold medal in the fresh or wet hop ale category at the 2018 World Beer Cup. A local outlet called it one of the city’s best breweries, and it had a 4

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Stir-fries, crab cakes and carbonara: Georgina Hayden’s crab recipes

It’s hard not to be excited by the arrival of spring and all the produce that will soon be gracing our kitchens. Asparagus, spinach and new potatoes can’t come soon enough, but it’s not just fruit and vegetables that I count down the days for – there’s plenty of seafood to celebrate too, and in particular crab. Sweet and delicate, its freshness mirrors the arrival of brighter, sunnier days. If you’re lucky enough to pick through a fresh crab, then it needs very little in way of adornment – a squeeze of lemon perhaps, and warm bread and salty butter. Thankfully for the time-poor among us, you can also buy pots of it pre-cooked and picked, which is glorious lightly spiced in a dip or for folding through pasta

3 days ago
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Rachel Roddy’s recipe for spaghetti with mushrooms, soft cheese and herbs | A kitchen in Rome

Before cooking something, it is never a bad idea to turn to the expert on the science of food and cooking, Harold McGee. This week, I had mushrooms, which, as he notes, are fruiting bodies, specialised structures that, encouraged by the parent body underground, force themselves up through the soil and open their umbrella-like cap so the gills or pores can release spores into passing air currents. The aim is the same as for all pushy parents: get the next generation into the world and hope they don’t get eaten in the process.I am hoping that a few million spores got out before the white and chestnut mushrooms I bought at our local supermarket were picked and packed. Mushrooms are often described as smelling and tasting earthy, but, as with most things, McGee is right

3 days ago
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Musk responsible for Twitter investors’ stock dropping when he bought company, jury rules

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‘It’s an excuse’: New York Giants’ Cam Skattebo says CTE and asthma are ‘fake’

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The WNBA’s historic deal teaches girls everywhere to advocate for themselves | Etan Thomas

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