Seth Meyers on Mark Carney’s White House visit: ‘The most Canadian confrontation I’ve ever seen’
Late-night hosts recapped the Canadian prime minister, Mark Carney, politely standing up to Donald Trump, the Vatican conclave and the president’s mysterious “big announcement”.On Late Night, Seth Meyers recapped Donald Trump’s poor reputation in Canada, which he has antagonized by referring to it as the “51st state”.“Congrats, Donald.You turned the most polite country on Earth into an enemy,” he joked on Wednesday evening.“This is like getting a handwritten letter from Mr Rogers that says: ‘Hey neighbor, I’m going to burn your fucking house down.
’”Trump joked about his role in swaying the recent election toward the Liberal party in his meeting with newly elected prime minister, Mark Carney, on Monday.Speaking from the Oval Office, Trump said: “I think I was probably the greatest thing that happened to him.I take full credit.”“Literally this guy won because Canadians hate Donald Trump so much, and Trump’s response is: ‘You’re welcome,’” Meyers laughed.Asked what his top concession from Canada would be, Trump answered: “friendship”.
“It is so revealing, and so deeply sad, that Trump considers friendship a concession,” Meyers noted.But “the friendly attitude didn’t last long” as Trump kept insisting that Canada would join the US as the 51st state, because Canadians would enjoy a “free military” and “tremendous medical cares”.“Medical cares?” Meyers marveled.“Oh yeah, I’m sure Canadians are jonesing to give up their free universal healthcare with cheap prescription drugs in exchange for American – what did you call it again? Medical cares? A system where you pay a thousand bucks a month for the privilege of filling out credit card forms when you’re still in the back of the ambulance?”Carney did not take the bait, instead reiterating that his country is “not for sale”.“That is the most Canadian confrontation I’ve ever seen,” said Meyers.
“I mean, sure, the text was ‘Uh, Mr President, with all due respect, you know in real estate some things are not for sale.’ But the subtext was ‘get your fucking hands off, you fucking poser’.”On The Late Show, Stephen Colbert celebrated the start of the Vatican conclave to select a new pope.“Who’s it going to be? A frontrunner who’s been around for decades, or a surprise newcomer like Cardinal Mikey Madison?” he quipped.The participating cardinals marched into the Sistine Chapel while chanting before the ceremonial closing of the doors, “protected, as always, by killer clowns”, Colbert joked, referring to the Swiss Guard.
“And now, my friends, we wait, while every cable news channel is laser-focused on the world’s most important roof tube,” also known as the chimney through which the popes indicate their decision, or lack of one, with white or black smoke.“I’ve been watching this all day, 24/7, I couldn’t tear myself away,” said Colbert.“And I have to say, and I’m sure this will never be taken out of context in any way: I am addicted to the pipe.”One of the favorites to become pope is Luis Antonio Tagle, the former archbishop of Manila.Tagle has gained support among online youths for his ability to sing, with some dubbing him the “karaoke priest”.
“Which means he always picks a really good homily but then realizes halfway through that he only knows the chorus,” Colbert joked.Another potential candidate is Cardinal Joseph Tobin, the archbishop of Newark, New Jersey.“We’re gettin’ a Jersey pope, people!” Colbert cheered.“Bada bing, bada bless you.I’m livin’ on a prayer over here.
In the name of the father, the son and the holy Bruuuuuuce,”“Donald Trump was sadly not invited to the conclave,” said Jimmy Kimmel on Wednesday,“He’s got other things to work on, including something that he promises that will be very bigly indeed,”According to Trump on Monday, the White House has a “very, very big announcement to make,Like, as big as it gets, and I won’t tell you on what.
But it’s very positive.”“What could this be?!” Kimmel wondered.“Do you think he’s announcing his weight, his actual weight? Maybe Melania is pregnant again.Wouldn’t that be sweet, to have another baby in the White House.I guess we’ll find out Thursday or Friday or Monday.
Or more likely probably never.“Why is the president teasing us like he’s Ryan Seacrest about to go to a commercial break?” he added.“This had better not be another set of his Trump NFTs or a golf tournament that he won.This feels like a dad who’s a gambling addict telling his family: ‘I have big news, we’re moving into an RV!’“But this is what happens when you put a loose cannon in the White House,” he concluded.“This could be about anything from new tariffs to announcing our next attorney general is Gary Busey.
Best-case scenario, Don Jr’s rabies test comes back negative.”Trump's mysterious big announcement could literally be anything from "I achieved peace in the Middle East" to "I just tried bucatini” pic.twitter.com/9bMHoLnMM7And on The Daily Show, Desi Lydic took on Trump’s mysterious big announcement.“So his announcement is that he’s got an announcement? Cool …” she deadpanned.
“It’s great to have a president who does teaser trailers for world events.It’s like when FDR said, ‘We only have one thing to fear, and I’ll tell you what it is after the break.’”According to Trump, the mystery announcement will be “one of the most important announcements that’s been made in many years about a certain subject”.“That narrows it down to literally anything,” said a puzzled Lydic.“This is Donald Trump, so his big announcement could be anything from ‘I’ve achieved peace in the Middle East’ to ‘I’ve just tried bucatini and I’m never going back to regular spaghetti.
’“Next time, just come out when you’re ready to say the announcement.We don’t need a pre-announcement,” she advised.“This is worse than my cousin announcing that they’re trying for a third child.Great, so you’re telling me that you’re fucking a lot? Call me when there’s a Gymboree registry.”
‘It’s all very sad’: Trump’s attack on arts funding has a devastating effect
On the afternoon of 3 May, arts organizations around the US began receiving cryptic emails from a previously unknown government email account. The missives declared that these organizations’ missions were no longer in line with new governmental arts priorities, which included helping to “foster AI competency”, “empower houses of worship” and “make America healthy again”.Chad Post, a publisher at Open Letter Books, a program of the University of Rochester that specializes in publishing translated literature, got his email just before entering a screening of Thunderbolts*. He put a quick post on Instagram, and when he came out of the movie his phone was full of responses. “I seemed to be the first one to receive this,” he recounted
Seth Meyers on Mark Carney’s White House visit: ‘The most Canadian confrontation I’ve ever seen’
Late-night hosts recapped the Canadian prime minister, Mark Carney, politely standing up to Donald Trump, the Vatican conclave and the president’s mysterious “big announcement”.On Late Night, Seth Meyers recapped Donald Trump’s poor reputation in Canada, which he has antagonized by referring to it as the “51st state”. “Congrats, Donald. You turned the most polite country on Earth into an enemy,” he joked on Wednesday evening. “This is like getting a handwritten letter from Mr Rogers that says: ‘Hey neighbor, I’m going to burn your fucking house down
Australia’s best small museums: celebrating apples, bottles, country music, dinosaurs …
In the small country town of Tingha in northern New South Wales sits a supermarket seemingly frozen in time: the Wing Hing Long and Company Store. Its shelves are lined with old products – canned food from the 90s, shoes from bygone eras, boxes of soap with retro graphics and bottles of spray-on starch. “It’s almost like you’re stepping back in history,” says artist Simone Rosenbauer. “It’s so amazing!”None of the products are for sale: this supermarket, established by storekeeper Ah Lin in 1881 to service the region’s tin-mining boom, is now a living museum – conserved by the local council after it closed in 1998 after nearly 120 years of business.The Wing Hing Long and Company Store is one of 41 rural museums Rosenbauer documented as part of her ambitious project Small Museum, which took her across every state and territory photographing community-run museums and interviewing the people behind them
Colbert on Trump administration’s ethos: ‘Take full responsibility and dump it on somebody else’
Late-night hosts dug into the chaos at Newark airport leading to a cascade of cancellations, Donald Trump’s alleged Hollywood tariffs and the visit of the Canadian prime minister, Mark Carney, to the White House.On Tuesday’s Late Show, Stephen Colbert looked into the cascade of delays at Newark airport this week, causing the cancellation of hundreds of flights. The culprit was a terrifying 90-second blackout during which air traffic controllers temporarily lost radar and communications with the aircraft under their control, making them unable to see, hear or talk to them. “Those are three fairly important things,” Colbert deadpanned.The blackout was caused by a fried piece of copper wire
Michael Pitt arrested for alleged sexual assault and attack on ex-girlfriend
Boardwalk Empire actor Michael Pitt has been arrested on sexual assault and domestic violence charges.According to the New York Post and Variety, the 44-year-old has been accused of multiple assaults by an ex-girlfriend stemming from four incidents taking place between 2020 and 2021.She alleges that Pitt sexually assaulted and attacked her with a cinderblock and a wooden plank at the actor’s Bushwick, Brooklyn, home. He is also accused of strangling her.The actor, whose credits also include Dawson’s Creek and films such as The Dreamers, Seven Psychopaths and Funny Games, pleaded not guilty after his arrest on Friday and is now out on bail
Art Fund to launch £5m project for UK museums to share their collections
A £5m project in which 20 museums will share their collections and expertise with each other could revolutionise the touring model in the UK.Going Places has been developed by Art Fund, the charity that secures art for public collections while providing financial support for museums, and will involve local people when the nationwide project launches in May 2026.Billed as “the UK’s largest ever collaborative touring project”, several institutions will work together on themed exhibitions while pooling resources and sharing expertise.Museums that wanted to take part met up and underwent a “matchmaking” process where they identified themes that interested them before splitting into groups.Museums Worcestershire, OnFife and Penlee House Gallery and Museum in Penzance will collaborate on exhibitions focusing on the female artists in their collections
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