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Jimmy Kimmel on Trump’s tax bill: ‘If this is the beautiful bill, I’d hate to see the ugly one’

about 24 hours ago
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Late-night hosts tore into the House’s all-nighter session to pass Donald Trump’s so-called “big, beautiful bill” of Republican talking points.Thursday marked “another wildly destructive day in Washington DC”, said Jimmy Kimmel that evening.“They pulled another all-nighter in the House last night, where they passed Trump’s big, beautiful bill.And man oh man, if this is the beautiful bill, I’d hate to see the ugly one.“I’m not sure which part of the bill is the most beautiful – the part where we take food from hungry kids?” he continued.

“Or the devastating effect it will have on college education? Or the trillions of dollars it will add to our national debt, or the $700bn in cuts to Medicaid,Either way, say goodbye to Grandma,”The over-1,000-page bill passed by the slimmest of margins: 215 votes to 214, “or as Trump called it, a landslide”, Kimmel said,“When something like this happens, you really get a look at the full bucket of chum, all the squeaky and creepy crackpots and kooks that we’ve entrusted with representing the United States,” Kimmel explained,“And with that said, welcome to Sycophantasy Island.

”Kimmel played a series of clips of GOP lawmakers touting the bill as the key to future US success.As one Republican congressman put it: “America is ready for takeoff.”“Yes, America is ready for takeoff.Unfortunately, we fired all the air traffic controllers,” Kimmel joked.“This was a big win for a little guy.

Magic Mike Johnson managed to pull an early-morning victory out of his Maga hat and he celebrated his victory with a sweet wet kiss on the big orange ass.”Speaking before Congress, Johnson said: “Today wouldn’t be possible without the leadership of arguably the most powerful and most successful and most respected president of the modern era of the United States.”“He almost kept a straight face,” Kimmel observed of his obsequiousness.“Even he started laughing a little.”On the Late Show, Stephen Colbert looked into Trump’s tenure at the Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts, after he purged the board and installed loyalists, with himself as chair.

“Trump continues to be obsessed with getting rid of what he calls ‘woke programming’ down at the Kennedy Center,” Colbert explained.On Monday, at a dinner “for the new regime”, Trump claimed the center “had some very inappropriate shows, to put it nicely” and railed against drag … even though the new season is full of drag performances, such as in Moulin Rouge!, Chicago and Mrs Doubtfire.“Mrs Doubtfire? That whole thing is drag,” Colbert laughed.“They’re going to have to quickly rewrite that one as Mr Straightwater.”JD Vance, meanwhile, is back in the news after “probably not maybe killing Pope Francis”, Colbert quipped.

“Seems like the vice-president is taking a unique approach with the pontiff,” because Vance reportedly discussed online dating during a private meeting with the new Pope Leo XIV.“Dude! Know your audience!” Colbert laughed.“The guy is celibate! Good lord …”On a podcast with the New York Times’s Ross Douthat, Vance said: “The dating apps are probably more destructive than we fully appreciated.”“I’m gonna say JD Vance’s views on this may not be as valuable as he thinks, considering the last dating app he was on was the Raymour & Flanigan,” Colbert joked, referring to the meme that Vance had sex with a couch (“not true, it didn’t happen, he never did it, and I do not care,” Colbert added).Trump’s bill isn’t just about taking from the poor and giving to the rich.

There’s gun stuff, too pic.twitter.com/axw4clzFCIAnd on the Daily Show, Ronny Chieng dug into the Republicans’ huge new bill.“The question is, what do you call an enormous bill that crams together every single Republican issue?” he jokingly wondered.To quote Trump: “One big, beautiful bill.

”“Really? Big, beautiful bill, that’s the best you could come up with?” Chieng mocked.“That’s a stupid name, OK? Also, that’s what Jordon Hudson calls Bill Belichick.”Chieng didn’t blame at least one commentator mixing up the BBB with BBL, or Brazilian butt lift.“Maybe BBL was a better name,” he said, “because this bill is thick and mostly ass”.The bill, he noted, cuts healthcare for the poor to fund tax cuts for the rich.

“The only way this could be more cartoonishly mean to poor people is if it says Bob Cratchit has to work on Christmas Day,” he joked.“The bill isn’t just about taking healthcare from poor people to give rich people tax cuts,” he added.“I’m sure there’s something in there for the rest of you.”Indeed, one provision tucked into the bill eliminates the $200 registration fee for gun silencers.“Let’s see, that was added by … Rhode Island representative John Wick?” Chieng joked.

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OpenAI buys iPhone architect’s startup for $6.4bn

OpenAI is buying an untested startup for $6.4bn, the ChatGPT maker’s biggest acquisition yet. The hardware startup, called io, was founded by Apple design guru Jony Ive, known best as one of the principal architects of the iPhone. Ive and OpenAI’s CEO, Sam Altman, said in a blog post that their partnership has been two years in the making.“A collaboration built upon friendship, curiosity and shared values quickly grew in ambition,” they wrote in the blog post, which offered scant details on upcoming devices

3 days ago
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Scattered Spider is focus of NCA inquiry into cyber-attacks against UK retailers

A hacker community known as Scattered Spider is a key suspect in a criminal inquiry into cyber-attacks against UK retailers including Marks & Spencer, detectives have said.Scattered Spider, a loose collective of native English-speaking cybercriminals, has been strongly linked with hacks against M&S, the Co-op and Harrods. M&S said on Wednesday it will take an estimated £300m hit to profits after its systems were hacked last month.The UK’s National Crime Agency, whose remit includes combating cybercrime, said the group was a focus in its investigations.“We are looking at the group that is publicly known as Scattered Spider, but we’ve got a range of different hypotheses and we’ll follow the evidence to get to the offenders,” Paul Foster, the head of the NCA’s national cybercrime unit, told the BBC

3 days ago
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Most AI chatbots easily tricked into giving dangerous responses, study finds

Hacked AI-powered chatbots threaten to make dangerous knowledge readily available by churning out illicit information the programs absorb during training, researchers say.The warning comes amid a disturbing trend for chatbots that have been “jailbroken” to circumvent their built-in safety controls. The restrictions are supposed to prevent the programs from providing harmful, biased or inappropriate responses to users’ questions.The engines that power chatbots such as ChatGPT, Gemini and Claude – large language models (LLMs) – are fed vast amounts of material from the internet.Despite efforts to strip harmful text from the training data, LLMs can still absorb information about illegal activities such as hacking, money laundering, insider trading and bomb-making

3 days ago
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‘Every person that clashed with him has left’: the rise, fall and spectacular comeback of Sam Altman

From Elon Musk to his own board, anyone who has come up against the OpenAI CEO has lost. In a gripping new account of the battle for AI supremacy, writer Karen Hao says we should all be wary of the power he now wieldsThe short-lived firing of Sam Altman, the CEO of possibly the world’s most important AI company, was sensational. When he was sacked by OpenAI’s board members, some of them believed the stakes could not have been higher – the future of humanity – if the organisation continued under Altman. Imagine Succession, with added apocalypse vibes. In early November 2023, after three weeks of secret calls and varying degrees of paranoia, the OpenAI board agreed: Altman had to go

3 days ago
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Elon Musk claims he will step back from political donations in near future

Elon Musk claimed on Tuesday that he would decrease the amount of money he spends on politics for the foreseeable future. If true, the reduction would represent a significant turnaround after the world’s richest person positioned himself as the Republican party’s most enthusiastic donor over the last year.“I think, in terms of political spending, I’m going to do a lot less in the future,” Musk said during a video interview with Bloomberg News at the Qatar Economic Forum.Bloomberg’s Mishal Husain asked the Tesla CEO if he had decided how much to spend on midterm elections, which elicited Musk’s response. When asked why he was pulling back, Musk said flatly: “I think I’ve done enough” – drawing laughs from the audience, although it was unclear if he was joking

4 days ago
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Almost half of young people would prefer a world without internet, UK study finds

Almost half of young people would rather live in a world where the internet does not exist, according to a new survey.The research reveals that nearly 70% of 16- to 21-year-olds feel worse about themselves after spending time on social media. Half (50%) would support a “digital curfew” that would restrict their access to certain apps and sites past 10pm, while 46% said they would rather be young in a world without the internet altogether.A quarter of respondents spent four or more hours a day on social media, while 42% of those surveyed admitted to lying to their parents and guardians about what they do online.While online, 42% said they had lied about their age, 40% admitted to having a decoy or “burner” account, and 27% said they pretended to be a different person completely

5 days ago
sportSee all
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England thrash West Indies by nine wickets: second women’s T20 international – as it happened

about 18 hours ago
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Sciver-Brunt inspires England to wrap up T20 series win over West Indies

about 19 hours ago
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Crocombe skittles Hampshire as Lancashire toil again – as it happened

about 19 hours ago
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‘My happy place’: Shoaib Bashir’s delight after taking historic 50th Test wicket

about 19 hours ago
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Sam Cook strikes early but he’s still in a race against time to convince England | Andy Bull

about 20 hours ago
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Bennett scores Zimbabwe’s fastest Test century before England regain grip

about 21 hours ago